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A love letter 

Its funny that i wrote my first love letter to my husband after a year of our marriage. But thats is the best part of it. 

I got married on Jan 31st. But for me i got married on thr Christmas eve. Our’s was a.. um.. well arranged love marriage. Our family friends made us to meet and in just 3 or 4 days we decided to get married. In a month we were engaged and in 4 months we were married. 

Both of us have the same POV regarding relationship and it follows ” Lets not go around with dating and then getting to know and so on. Lets get married and then lets know each other.” For both of us it was like an adventure rollar coaster ride. Adrenaline and so much. 

So this love letter i wrote was not a surprise to him. But was full of surprises.

It goes like this

This is something that i wanted to tell you long back.How can you be sooooo charming and uuffffffffffff bloody hootttttt, making me want you all the time. You are like fire for me, the heat never leaves. Whenever i feel its going to be a show night i m excited to levels you can’t imagine. its like the first time.That adventure peak you took me on Christmas eve is still there. It feels like tht same night. For more than 500 days and nights its been the same, that thirst and desire is same.  The excitement is same from day one,Its still there.. i ll never get enough of you ever. You have grown in me like the root of a giant tree.It goes deeper in me day by day. I love you and desire you, each and every piece of you day after day… It’s like a thrill, an Excitement, an Adventure. Something that makes me do all kind of weird things.. wish for all weird things.  Simply you drive me crazy. YOU are irresistibly.My fox.I m yours only yours and i ll never ever get bored of you, because you are that spark that set whole of me, my whole world to fire.

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bREaK FREe

I was swiping through my facebook page and i wondered what possibly went wrong with my whole world….
 
i saw a totally different person smiling n posing upside down in my profile pic. i’m no more me. i’ve lost myself. In between these transformation of time i lost that perky, fun filled, crazy , party maker of the gang girl.. now as i look at the mirror, i dont recognize the person standing. i cant take this anymore… i want tht me back… i want my life back… i wake every morning and wish all this to be a nightmare. ..i wanna wake up in that hostel room where i spend three precious years of my life with 5 nut cases… mad, fun, love, party, joy, tears, fight, Halloween, girl talk n much more…… where every boring day can be turned into dance party day… camera’s clicking every now n then… Laughter… loud ones… Music, Movies, Makeovers, Shopping, Trips…..
 
they say heaven is wat you make… but seriously some times you are thrown into hell n you couldn’t connect to anyone or you are juz alone n all others are either more than your wavelength ppl or less…
 
Even my orange umbrella is getting fade… yes it looks like my colours are fading n its killing me…. i cant connect to the ppl around me… my work place is totally different. filled with older ppl… n ppl with whom i have nothing in common (Not even the same food thing). n orthodox ppl… i’m not moulded for this type of life… n if this is wat my future holds then i’m not gonna take it…  
 
if i cant change this i’ll surely avenge it….
 
Every night i think of this beach side where i will walk… wind sweeping over my cheeks…. i spreading my arms n enjoying every bit of it… n breathing in the raw smell…… i feel freedom… yes,…. i want to break-free…. Elope with my friends…. i miss them sooooo much…
 
i wanna scream like hell… there’s nothing to distract… no one in my life to talk this over… (yeah yeah i know this is wat happens to single ppl)… its one of those disgusting feeling you get while you are in periods….. i tries like a 1000 things… tried to drown in my job but eventually you’ll have to come out of the trench… n once you do that its back to Square one again….
 
This feeling is like a black hole… once you start falling into it… there’s no come back…
 
 
aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
I WANNA BREAK FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE……………!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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“To Read” Shelf

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These are the books i intent to read this year…… and i’ve jux gone through 4 of them… its a big task for me.. but its quiet interesting and challenging one….. but the hottest problem is the heat itself… its a dead dry summer here this year… too hot that i cant even look at these books…

every noon i’m sleeping coz i’m too tired of this summer heat… i haven’t turned a page from my currently reading one”Bright Girls”… its been weeks…. same is the case with night… not hot… but a cool atmosphere… again you get carried away to your bed….

cant help… well i’m juz waiting for raining time this year… i’ll read n read n read… so for this moment… its jux gonna be the “TO READ”shelf……

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Pooram: the essence of Kerala

Pooram is the true essence of kerala… here are some pics of the pooram at my place. i belong to a place called pattambi, in palakkad district, kerala. these pics are from the pooram of “kulangara mahadevi temple”

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